I was thinking this weekend about the advice I would give to my younger self, before the children were in or near their teen years, before technology got in the way of real relationships, and before I had a chance to make so many mistakes.
I would tell myself that kids hardly listen when voices are raised, that sometimes, “I don’t know,” is all they’ve got, and that “clean” is a relative term.
I would teach my children how to fold clothes correctly, how to fill a dishwasher properly, and how to vacuum the whole room, not just the places you can see.
I would teach them to make their beds every day, to pick up their clothes, and to put their toys away.
I would teach them that socks belong in three places – on their feet, in the hamper, or in a drawer – but never scattered by the back door or around the sunroom, in the basement, or under their beds.
The children are young, and I hold out hope that some of these things will be learned in time, but it will probably require me to learn how to fold clothes correctly and unplug from my phone or iPad as an example. To be fair, our children are fun to be around like to have a good time. They are helpful some of the times and mean to each other just enough to be irritating. Like any child these days, they get bored easily and get drawn into YouTube or television, or an app on the iPad way too easily. If I could afford it, I would quit my job for the summer months and hang out with my kids – doing something more interesting each day.
In tomorrow’s Gospel reading from Matthew, we are reminded that we are called to “be perfect just like your heavenly Father is perfect.” I suppose that advice holds true for my children too. If I want good behavior, I need to model it. If I want a clean house, good manners, folded laundry, and children who know when to unplug, that begins with me.
Then again, if I want children who have bad eating habits, like to binge watch crime shows, and don’t mind the dust, I am well on my way to perfection.
God bless all fathers and the examples they set.