There is a great song in the musical Bye Bye Birdie, where the characters lament all the things that are wrong with kids today. Surely if the song were rewritten for modern times, someone would be singing about the rise of anxiety among young people.
Don’t believe me? Read this article. And this one. And this one. And this one.
The reality is that for a number of reasons, young people today are less comfortable in their own skin than ever before. What is a parent to do? May I be so bold as to suggest three things?
Cut the cord. Yes, even the invisible one. The best $99 we spent recently was for a device called the Circle. It started as a Kickstarter campaign and was soon bought by Disney, who saw the potential. Essentially, it is a device that allows a parent to set up an account for each child, assign whichever device said child uses to that account, and set limits. The children living with me get anywhere from forty-five minutes to an hour and a half, sometimes more, of Internet time. Then the Circle kicks them off. I notice that when the Internet time is up, the Legos come out or, even better, the children rediscover the great outdoors. Plus, it lets me track their usage. I can see everything they watch and everything they do online. If chores are not getting done, I can hit the pause button and every device on the Circle shuts down the Internet to the whole house.
Eat together. Survey after survey will tell you that young people who eat at least five meals a week with their family are more likely to live longer, healthier lives, all while avoiding at-risk behavior. For Catholics, I would add that, according to research I have found, families who eat together raise children more likely to remain faithful later in life.
Listen. Young people today are struggling with self-esteem, self-worth, and are searching for communities that value and love them. How can they fall in love with a God they never meet? How can they find acceptance in a community that never listens? Mom and Dad – put your own phones down and listen to what your child has to say.
The list is short and incomplete, non-scientific and opinionated. But the children hate the Circle, so I know it was a great purchase. They are learning manners and to pass things instead of slide them across the table, where the forks go, and how to share, so that’s something. And the stories they tell when we chat about the day? Well, just listen for yourself sometime and you will see what I mean.
May your week be blessed.
~pjd